In the highlands of Sakteng, a wedding is more than the union of two people. From prayers led by village elders to songs that accompany each step of the bride and groom, the ceremony is a reflection of a tradition deeply rooted in identity and belonging. In this story, we take you through this unique ritual and celebration.
Tshering Zangmo is all smiles on her big day. Her cousin helps her into layers of traditional Brokpa attire. Once ready, she is led into the ceremonial room where the groom, Sherub Phuntsho from Lauri gewog in Samdrup Jongkhar, waits. They are getting married in the Brokpa tradition. As per local belief, the custom traces its roots to Tibet during the reign of King Songtsen Gampo.
The village lam or an astrologer begins the ancient rites, binding the new union to the blessings of the land and its guardians. An experienced elder or relatives appointed by the family manage the ceremony’s careful progression. Nothing is left to chance.
The gathering moves through a sequence of rituals.
Tea is served to the couple and the guests, followed by locally brewed drinks. Songs rise in the local dialect. But they are not merely performances. They guide the ceremony itself.
“We cannot just place the ceremonial scarves. We sing songs with prayers and well wishes, and according to the lyrics, we place the scarves. Similarly, we have different songs for the bride, from standing up from her seat to entering the other house,” said Sangay Dorji, Sakteng, Trashigang.
Marriage arrangements also reflect the community’s structure.
“Some of our marriages are arranged within relatives, while others are within the community. First, the parents discuss among themselves and exchange ceremonial scarves before the couple is allowed to speak and make their decision. Our tradition also includes the sharing of property and supporting children starting a new life,” said Dorji Tshering, Sakteng, Trashigang.
Families provide cattle, grains, money, and other property as support for the couple as they begin their married life.
The celebrations then move outdoors, where neighbours gather to offer blessings and prayers.
Later, the couple return to the house, where more celebrations continue.
Relatives and neighbours promise support – from cattle and clothing to cash and household belongings, helping the newlyweds start their future together.
But amid the rich celebrations is a growing concern.
Modern lifestyles, marriages outside the community, and the cost of conducting elaborate rituals are slowly changing how weddings are celebrated in Sakteng.
“I feel that such traditional practices are declining. These days, not many people marry in the traditional style, and it could eventually disappear. It’s concerning,” said Dorji Tshering, Sakteng, Trashigang.
However, some believe the tradition can survive if seen as something to be shared rather than protected.
“If people from outside the community want to get married in our culture, we are happy to organise. This invitation is open to those from outside Bhutan as well. We can arrange their wedding ceremony,” said Sangay Dorji, Sakteng, Trashigang.
The traditional Brokpa marriage ceremony was also showcased as part of the recent Great Yeti Quest organised in Sakteng. For the community, such inclusion was a quiet act of preservation. It provided a glimmer of hope for keeping alive the songs, blessings, and shared responsibilities that have long held the community together.
Sonam Darjay, Trashigang
Edited by Sonam Wangdi
